My First Gay Gathering - A story
I had never been to a private gay gathering ever. My friend Rajit invited me to his birthday bash at his boyfriend’s 24th floor apartment in Mahalaxmi. “There will be quite a few interesting guys”, he’d promised me. From day one I was pretty excited about it.

My initiation into the Gay life of Bombay had been last year, courtesy Rajit. We had a fling of sorts. I was a virgin from up North and he was a veteran mourning his last break-up and looking for newer pastures. I made a good lay for him, but was not boyfriend material. First of all I was too awkward most of the times; I knew more than him about most things; our age difference of almost 9 years, my “no anals” stand; so many things. But we remained in touch and he assumed the role of my guide and teacher. Lately, he had gotten too busy with his new love and we were meeting for the first time in almost two months time.

After Rajit I met a couple of other guys. My dating scene has always been sparsely populated. No one clicked to me and I clicked to no one. There was one guy who seemed to be besotted with me, but he had a wife and a girlfriend in the office. I didn’t see him having much time for me. So, cutting a long story short, this invitation was a major highlight of my gay life till then. I was too chicken to go to GB parties and similar gatherings and was becoming more and more wary of meeting people over the net. So, the prospect of a peaceful party with a few friendly guys was almost like a dream.

I prepared hard for the day. One week before the event I had my hair done at Juice. Selected a nice Sherwani style white shirt by Raghvendra Rathod and beige Rohit Bal slacks I had picked from Delhi last year. I decided against colored contact lenses but got myself nice shades. I attended a couple of Kaya skin sessions to get that glowing skin they keep advertising about. I increased my time on the treadmills and started running up and down stairs in my building.

Rajit’s boyfriend Ehsaan works with a foreign bank as Investment Banker and I was expecting a lot of suitable guys to be present at the party. I rehearsed my answers to some imaginary interesting questions asked by devastatingly handsome guys. I smiled and basked in the glory of my smart rejoinders to snide remarks from jealous guys. I prepared myself for situations like an interesting guy asking me out and another where someone undesirable asks me out. As each day passed I started feeling more and more confident about my imminent victory over the gathering. I could vividly see myself sitting on a couch surrounded by all; Rajit & Ehsaan standing in the corner of their terrace and marveling at my success. Hmm…

On Friday, two days before the big day, I was all ready and daring to bare myself. Each minute, each hour was taking an eternity to pass. Girish, my next cubicle neighbor at work had noticed the change in me and kept giving me meaningful stares which left me confused every time it happened. I call him Garish. He is absolutely flamboyant. Heartthrob of the office. For the first few weeks after joining this office I was totally infatuated with him. Then I used to think “this is love”. I grew out of it in good time. Just last month somebody clicked him tonguing an intern and forwarded the clip to everyone in the office. It grossed me even more. Nobody knows who started it, but everyone had a role to play in it. I received it from 4 different people in the office. The girl in question, a summer trainee looked a beautiful shade of pink throughout the next week; she seemed to be enjoying the attention. Girish on the other hand remained unfazed by it. If anything, he became more open with his flirtatious intents.

I am going off track. So, this strange behavior of Girish was bothering me. I have been on less than friendly terms with him. Earlier in my infatuation days I was never able to look him in the eyes and hardly ever spoke more than three words at a time to him. Once I grew out of the infatuation, I kept my distance, as all of a sudden he had become all those things I didn’t want in my boyfriend. I hated the way he used to steal the show from under everyone’s nose. Once at one of the meetings, when I had presented my proposal for the new product launch, he cracked some joke at my expense and everyone was double with laughter and I was left seething.

That day, in the evening, before leaving the office he came to my cubicle, and asked me if I had a hot date for the weekend. I took 30 seconds to debate in my mind whether or not I should say yes. I finally managed to mumble a meek yes. He laughed aloud and wished me luck. Luck my ass! Like I wouldn’t survive a date without his blessings. I had another of those feelings of absolute hatred for him.

That night I called Rajit to find out how many guys were coming but he was on voicemail. Rajit on voicemail means only one thing – he is having sex. Otherwise, he and his mobile are almost inseparable and he answers all calls at all times.

Saturday was turning out to be a very bad day for me. I am simply not good at waiting. Nothing could keep my mind occupied for more than a few seconds. Now, the fear of the unknown was beginning to replace the excitement & the butterflies in my stomach were growing bigger and bigger. My rejoinders started falling flat in my imaginary spats. I started stumbling upon the rugs and falling in the curry bowl that was large enough for me to drown in it. I started stuttering while rendering a joke. My clothes started looking out of place, out of style to me. Everything was falling apart. My imagination that had made me so happy till a few days ago started making me mad.

By next morning I was a total wreck. I reached Ehsaan’s building dot on time. 11.30 am. But that was it. I was unable to move any further. I kept imagining nice looking, suave and interesting people having a nice time. I spent 40 minutes circling the building and waiting under the tree across the complex. Finally, I decided to make a move.

I pressed the call bell and the door was opened by Ehsaan. He hugged and led me towards the living room. There were some two dozen people scattered over the living room area and the adjoining terrace. Rajit came forward and hugged me tightly. I started feeling a little better but I didn’t see myself doing all those antics I thought of throughout the week.

I took to a corner where a bean bag lay empty. There were all sorts of guys. A couple of old acquaintances, people I had met while I was with Rajit, came forward and we talked for a few minutes; then I let them drift away by not offering more than two syllables in answer to their queries. A guy of around 40 years of age sat on the other bean bag across from me. He kept giving me the “I have an eye on you” look. I couldn’t help but look at him; he was dressed in a shocking pink kurta and chudidaar pajamas. He sat like some “Johrabai” watching her protégé perform before the nawabs. Funny way to sit. There were a couple of teenagers, who were busy amongst themselves. One of them kept throwing glances at me and I flattered myself. A little later I went to the dining where different snacks were laid and picked a couple of mutton chops and returned to my place – to find that very same teenager who was eyeing me was now sprawled on the couch.

I drifted towards the terrace. There was a group of middle-aged guys which was discussing the GB party on last Friday. Apparently none got a partner for the night and were quite disappointed and blamed it all on the superfluous & shallow ways of the young ones. “These kids, they are very shallow, all they want is a good looking face and fit body; character and intelligence means nothing to them” and similar lamentations. I moved towards another group which was discussing KY Jelly. All three of them wanted to experiment with it, but were too afraid to go to a medical shop and ask for it. Rajit was in a heated discussion with another guy. They seemed to be discussing Paheli as India’s entry to the Oscars.

All of a sudden I became as stiff as a pole. I heard a familiar laughter and rushed towards the living room. The scene inside was the same. The guy in Pink Kurta was now standing near the large window and was staring out. He stood like the “virahini” looking for her lover. Funny way to stand. But I couldn’t fix the laughter on to someone. I blamed it on my confused and nervous senses.

The cigarette smoke started getting to me. The living room was bad, the terrace was not much better. I moved towards the inside of the apartment. I tried one door and found it locked from inside. Tried another door and it opened. On the other end was another door that opened on to a balcony and the door was open. I rushed towards it. The view was breathtaking. Then something else happened that took my breath and my life away.

He made his presence known to me by calling my name “Prithvi”. I was stunned; unable to speak I turned and saw that smile I have seen so many times. Garish was giving his most brilliant smile. He was grinning. He was actually gloating and I was giving him enough reasons. He must have known all this time that I was coming to this party because there was nothing on his face that could be mistaken for surprise. I on the other hand was unable to think or react. I stuttered a measly “Hi”. He came forward and shook my hand warmly and then almost killed me when he bent forward and left a light peck on my cheek.

Today when I look at that day, I can’t help smiling. Girish is an ex of Ehsaan. They dated during their management degree. One day when the party was being discussed and the invitee list being prepared, Girish was there helping Ehsaan & Rajit as he was in charge of arranging the caterer. That is when he came across my name and confirmed with Rajit about my identity. He then extracted a promise from Rajit that he would keep quiet about it. The knowledge of me being a gay painted an entirely different picture of me in his mind. He started paying attention to me. And that day at the party when he was debating with himself on the balcony about how to meet me, I walked in on him. He asked me out and the rest as they say is history.